Why Can't You Read My Mind?

Overcoming the 9 Toxic Thought Patterns that Get in the Way of a Loving Relationship
Author: Jeffrey Bernstein,Susan Magee
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 9781569244753
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 224
View: 1623

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Most people think that poor communication is the reason why so many relationships end, but it's actually the way we learn to think about our partners and our problems that kills trust, erodes intimacy, and cripples communication. In Why Can't You Read My Mind?, psychologist Jeffrey Bernstein reveals-for the first time-the nine toxic thought patterns at work in virtually every relationship, and shows couples how these distorted, negative, exaggerated thoughts can poison their love and end their union. With warmth and wisdom, Bernstein offers a simple yet powerful approach for breaking the toxic thinking cycle and helps readers establish new and more positive thinking habits for solving their problems and dealing with the stresses of everyday life. Packed with practical advice and valuable insights, Why Can't You Read My Mind? makes it possible for couples to remain in or return to loving relationships permanently, and points the way toward finding a truer kind of love with one another for the first time. Perfect for couples wanting to maintain their loving relationship as well as for those working to restore their love, this book provides the missing link, enabling couples to beat the relationship odds and sustain a long-term relationship.

Liking the Child You Love

Build a Better Relationship with Your Kids--Even When They're Driving You Crazy
Author: Jeffrey Bernstein
Publisher: Da Capo Press
ISBN: 0786748087
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 272
View: 8789

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“I shouldn’t have to tell him that again!” “She is just so spoiled.” “They don’t appreciate anything I do for them.” Do you feel like you’re at the end of your rope? Are you exhausted by your kids arguing over every little thing? Finally there’s a name for your feelings: “Parent Frustration Syndrome” (PFS). No kid is perfect, but parents often don’t realize just how much their own thoughts, rather than their children’s behavior, contribute to being emotionally overwhelmed and discouraged. In Liking the Child You Love, Renowned psychologist Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein offers proven strategies for taming the 9 most common toxic thought patterns that stop us from parenting effectively: • The “Always or Never” Trap • Label Gluing • Seething Sarcasm • Smoldering Suspicions • Detrimental Denial • Emotional Overheating • Blame Blasting • “Should” Slamming • Dooming Conclusions As you identify and put a stop to PFS’s negative thought patterns, you’ll be amazed at how your kids’ defiant behavior quickly improves, without having to raise your voice or dole out harsh punishments. Soon you will have a closer, calmer, and more loving relationship with your kids—just by changing your own mindset.

The Veterans and Active Duty Military Psychotherapy Treatment Planner, with DSM-5 Updates


Author: Bret A. Moore,Arthur E. Jongsma, Jr.
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons
ISBN: 1119064112
Category: Psychology
Page: 340
View: 5639

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This timesaving resource features: Treatment plan components for 39 behaviorally based presenting problems Over 1,000 prewritten treatment goals, objectives, and interventions—plus space to record your own treatment plan options A step-by-step guide to writing treatment plans that meet the requirements of most insurance companies and third-party payors Includes Evidence-Based Practice Interventions as required by many public funding sources and private insurers PracticePlanners® THE BESTSELLING TREATMENT PLANNING SYSTEM FOR MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS The Veterans and Active Duty Military Psychotherapy Treatment Planner provides all the elements necessary to quickly and easily develop formal treatment plans that satisfy the demands of HMOs, managed care companies, third-party payors, and state and federal agencies. Features empirically supported, evidence-based treatment interventions Organized around 39 main presenting problems in treating veterans and active duty military personnel, including substance abuse, adjustment to killing, anger management and domestic violence, pre-deployment stress, survivors' guilt, and combat and operational stress reaction Over 1,000 prewritten treatment goals, objectives, and interventions—plus space to record your own treatment plan options Easy-to-use reference format helps locate treatment plan components by behavioral problem Designed to correspond with The Veterans and Active Duty Military Psychotherapy Progress Notes Planner Includes a sample treatment plan that conforms to the requirements of most third-party payors and accrediting agencies including CARF, The Joint Commission (TJC), COA, and the NCQA Additional resources in the PracticePlanners® series: Progress Notes Planners contain complete, prewritten progress notes for each presenting problem in the companion Treatment Planners. Homework Planners feature behaviorally based, ready-to-use assignments to speed treatment and keep clients engaged between sessions. For more information on our PracticePlanners®, including our full line of Treatment Planners, visit us on the Web at: www.wiley.com/practiceplanners

The Family Therapy Treatment Planner, with DSM-5 Updates, 2nd Edition


Author: Frank M. Dattilio,Arthur E. Jongsma, Jr.,Sean D. Davis
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons
ISBN: 1119064074
Category: Psychology
Page: 368
View: 9941

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This timesaving resource features: Treatment plan components for 40 behaviorally based presenting problems Over 1,000 prewritten treatment goals, objectives, and interventions—plus space to record your own treatment plan options A step-by-step guide to writing treatment plans that meet the requirements of most accrediting bodies, insurance companies, and third-party payors Includes new Evidence-Based Practice Interventions as required by many public funding sources and private insurers PracticePlanners® THE BESTSELLING TREATMENT PLANNING SYSTEM FOR MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS The Family Therapy Treatment Planner, Second Edition provides all the elements necessary to quickly and easily develop formal treatment plans that satisfy the demands of HMOs, managed care companies, third-party payors, and state and federal agencies. New edition features empirically supported, evidence-based treatment interventions Organized around 40 main presenting problems including child/parent conflicts, depression, abuse, death and loss issues, blended family problems, and loss of family cohesion Over 1,000 prewritten treatment goals, objectives, and interventions—plus space to record your own treatment plan options Easy-to-use reference format helps locate treatment plan components by behavioral problem Designed to correspond with The Family Therapy Progress Notes Planner, Second Edition and the Brief Family Therapy Homework Planner, Second Edition Includes a sample treatment plan that conforms to the requirements of most third-party payors and accrediting agencies including CARF, The Joint Commission (TJC), COA, and the NCQA Additional resources in the PracticePlanners® series: Progress Notes Planners contain complete, prewritten progress notes for each presenting problem in the companion Treatment Planners. Homework Planners feature behaviorally based, ready-to-use assignments to speed treatment and keep clients engaged between sessions. For more information on our PracticePlanners®, including our full line of Treatment Planners, visit us on the Web at: www.wiley.com/practiceplanners

10 Days to a Less Defiant Child, second edition

The Breakthrough Program for Overcoming Your Child's Difficult Behavior
Author: Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D.
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 0738218243
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 336
View: 7086

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Occasional clashes between parents and children are not uncommon, but when defiant behavior—including tantrums, resistance to chores, and negativity—becomes chronic, it causes big problems within the family. In 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child,family and child psychologist Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein shares a groundbreaking ten–day program to help parents understand their child’s behavior and regain control of their household. In this updated edition, parents will learn how to face new challenges, including defiance resulting from excessive technology use (even to the point of addiction) and the stress of modern family life. Dr. Bernstein explains what causes defiance in kids and why it’s so destructive to the family, then offers parents a step–by–step guide on how to reduce conflict and end upsetting behaviors.

Fight Less, Love More

5-Minute Conversations to Change Your Relationship without Blowing Up or Giving In
Author: Laurie Puhn
Publisher: Rodale
ISBN: 1609618890
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 272
View: 1833

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A Harvard-trained lawyer and mediator shows busy couples how to stop fighting and start communicating. In Fight Less, Love More, readers will learn how to identify the bad verbal habits, instinctive responses, and emotional reasoning that can cloud judgment and ultimately lead to the deterioration of otherwise healthy relationships. With exercises, examples, and sample scripts, Puhn’s modern voice presents simple 5-minute strategies create immediate, positive changes and provide long-lasting communication skills that couples can continually employ when faced with conflict.

The Couple's Retirement Puzzle

10 Must-Have Conversations for Creating an Amazing New Life Together
Author: Roberta Taylor,Dorian Mintzer
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 140229591X
Category: Self-Help
Page: 368
View: 9095

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The essential guide for couples to create a happy, healthy, and successful retirement! Retirement can be the best time of your life, but for couples, there's far more to it than cashing in on your 401(k). The most important asset you have during retirement is each other, yet many couples aren't sure where to begin to prepare for retired life or what to consider as they do. The Couple's Retirement Puzzle reveals ten key conversations couples should tackle before retirement to ensure a rewarding second half of life together, including: • Do we have enough money to support the lifestyle we want? • Should we retire simultaneously or separately? • Do we stay put or explore new frontiers? • What's the best way to stay healthy and fit after fifty? • How do we meet new friends and create new interests outside of work? • How will we balance time together and time apart? • And more! Filled with smart practical advice, engaging anecdotes, and helpful exercises,The Couple's Retirement Puzzle will guide you and your partner to a fulfilling retirement you can enjoy and celebrate together.

Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love

Relationship Repair in a Flash
Author: Nancy Dreyfus, Psy.D.
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1101159553
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 304
View: 7453

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“The most crucial relationship advice book since Men Are from Mars.”—Erin Meanley, Glamour.com A groundbreaking, interactive relationship tool that literally places in the hands of couples the power to transform chronically frustrating relationship dynamics. We've all been there. A conversation with a loved one escalates into conflict. Voices rise to a fever pitch and angry, accusative words fly through the air. At times like these, it seems impossible to find the magic words that will lead to healing. Enter Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love. A psychotherapist with decades of experience in counseling couples, Nancy Dreyfus hit upon the revolutionary practice outlined in this book during a couples-therapy session in which a wife’s unrelenting criticism of her husband was causing him to become emotionally withdrawn. In the midst of this, Dreyfus found herself scribbling on a scrap of paper, “Talk to me like I'm someone you love,” and gestured to the husband that he should hold it up. He did and within seconds the familiar power differential between the two shifted, and a gentler, more genuine connection emerged. Dreyfus was startled, then intrigued, and then motivated to create a tool that could help others. This book features more than one hundred of Dreyfus's "flash cards for real life," written statements that express what we wish we could communicate to the person we love, but either can't find the right words or the right tone in which to say it. The statements include: • Taking responsibility: "I realize I'm overreacting. Can you give me a minute to get sane again?" • Apologizing: "I know I've really hurt you. What can I do to help you trust me again?" • Loving: "You are precious, and I get that I haven't been treating you like you are." A one-of-a-kind, practical relationship tool, Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love will help couples to stop arguing and begin healing.

What About Me?

Stop Selfishness from Ruining Your Relationship
Author: Jane Greer
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 1402242980
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 240
View: 7722

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"Am I with the most selfish person alive?" "Am I being selfish when I do the things I want to do?" "If you loved me, you would..." The battle of what "I want" versus what "you want" is intense. Couples are in a constant tug of war, squabbling with each other with no regard for their partner's feelings, with great guilt over their own perceived selfishness, or feeling somewhere in between. And it's costing us our relationships. What About Me? will guide readers through the new terrain of relationships in this era of entitlement, showing how selfishness plays a role and helping you better understand what being selfish really is. Learn to: see beyond what you perceive as selfish requests-your partner's and your own conquer the selfish hot spots that flare up in your relationship understand all the differences, fears, and preferences that come between couples Through anecdotes and quizzes, and drawing from Dr. Jane Greer's more than twenty years of experience in relationship counseling, What About Me? will teach readers what's reasonable to expect of themselves and their partners, equip them with the tools to move from "me" to "we," and get them back on track to happily ever after. "Finally, a simply put yet deeply resonating guide to help us eliminate toxic messages that feed into our relationships! Keep What About Me? next to your bedside and get what you need, immediately!" -Emme, supermodel "What About Me? unabashedly digs deeply into the origins of conflict in relationships and paves the way for resolution, healing, and happiness. This is a book that will serve all of us well." -David Perlmutter, MD, author of Power Up Your Brain: The Neuroscience of Enlightenment

The Power of Positive Confrontation

The Skills You Need to Handle Conflicts at Work, at Home, Online, and in Life, completely revised and updated edition
Author: Barbara Pachter
Publisher: Da Capo Press
ISBN: 0738217603
Category: Psychology
Page: 264
View: 8842

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When slighted, misunderstood, cut in front of, annoyed, taken advantage of, or treated rudely, most people avoid their bosses, ignore coworkers, change hairdressers, complain to friends, pound their fists, or rant on social media. They often miss the most positive, effective alternative of all: confronting positively. Now, for everyone who was never taught or never realized that between "bully" and "wimp" is a range of behavior that is positive, dignified, and effective for dealing with life's bothersome situations, there is The Power of Positive Confrontation. This book teaches you the vital skills you need to confront others, communicate effectively, and live a more conflict-free life. In this updated edition, communications expert Barbara Pachter shares a practical, step-by-step guide to tackling conflicts in any situation, including a new section on navigating sticky situations online. The Power of Positive Confrontation reveals: The consequences of not confronting or of confronting negatively How to accurately assess what is bothering you and why Three essential steps of polite and powerful confrontation Vital verbal and nonverbal skills that make or break communication, including common language pitfalls Strategies for assertive communication, whether face to face, in writing, by phone, or online

Love Is a Verb - 30 Days to Improving Your Relationship Communication: Learn How to Nurture a Deeper Love by Mastering the Art of Heart-To-Heart Relationship Communication


Author: Simeon Lindstrom
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781502530660
Category:
Page: 72
View: 5485

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Have you ever noticed how often people say they wish they could "find" love? As if love were something beautiful to just stumble upon on the side of the road. Yet when you speak to happily married couples, especially those that have been married for decades, they never ascribe their success and happiness to luck. Instead, they'll probably tell you that a good relationship takes work - lots of it - and the continued effort and maintenance from both sides. Love is a verb. It is not something only some people are fortunate enough to catch and then merely set aside. It's not a prize you win or a box to tick on your life's checklist. Instead, love has to be kindled and rebuilt every day; it has to be invited in, nurtured, cultivated. Love is not something passive that you simply have or don't have - it's an active process and the continual expression of what's in your heart, mind and soul. In this book, love is not a noun. It isn't some mysterious gift from the gods that falls into our laps, but something that we can work on and build with intention. So, in that spirit, this book will not be a dispassionate list of relationship advice, or theories about the way people work together, or tips to heat up your sex life. Instead, this book will ask you to become actively involved, to not just read but to constantly apply what has been read to your own life. And since we are on the topic of heart-to-heart communication, you're naturally going to need to rope in your partner, too. The exercises are experiential, meaning, simply, that you have to actually do them in order to benefit from them. You'll be asked to be honest with yourself, get out there into the world and even make yourself vulnerable. Some of these exercises will be fun, others will scare and challenge you - but they are all designed to open your heart to more effective communication with others, so that the relationships you build are strong, heart centered and compassionate. This book is written for anyone who feels that they are not living (and loving!) to their full potential. Whether you crave deeper connections with others or want to reignite relationships you are already in, this book was written to help you master the art of good communication. Here Is What You Will Learn After Reading This Book: - The characteristics of a dysfunctional relationship - Key components that make up a heart-centered relationship - The art of communication - How to nurture the flame - Things to be aware of when it comes to love in our time of social networks - A practical and interactive 30-day challenge that will improve your relationship communication and nurture a stronger and deeper love I wish you all the best! Take care! /Simeon

The Science of Positivity

Stop Negative Thought Patterns by Changing Your Brain Chemistry
Author: Loretta Graziano Breuning
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1440599661
Category: Psychology
Page: 224
View: 1599

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Learn the scientific benefits of positivism! Sometimes it's easiest to look for the worst in every situation--our brains have evolved to scan for problems in order to help avoid them. But you can transcend this natural negativity--if you know how. The Science of Positivity teaches you how cynical thought habits are formed, and how you can rewire yourself to go beyond them. Neurochemical expert Loretta Graziano Breuning, PhD, empowers you to transcend negativity by creating new thought habits. You'll learn simple, practical actions you can take to shift your thinking to a way that causes your brain to reward optimism with the release of happy chemicals. You can even permanently replace cynical thought patterns with realistic and optimistic thoughts. In just minutes a day for six weeks, you will build new pathways to see the world in new ways. Frustration is an inevitable part of life, but rather than using cynicism to manage frustration, you can rewire your brain to get beyond it.

Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love

Flash Cards for Real Life
Author: Nancy Dreyfus
Publisher: Celestial Arts
ISBN: 9780890878163
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 433
View: 3622

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Using a wide variety of international examples, this book provides the reader with the conceptual tools necessary for analyzing organizational behaviour in the context of hospitality and leisure and tourism provision.

Attached

The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find - and Keep - Love
Author: Amir Levine,Rachel Heller
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 9781101475164
Category: Family & Relationships
Page: 304
View: 6532

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Is there a science to love? In this groundbreaking book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many bestselling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships-until now. Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes. In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: *ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back. *AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. *SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers readers a wealth of advice on how to navigate their relationships more wisely given their attachment style and that of their partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.

Conquer Negative Thinking for Teens

A Workbook to Break the Nine Thought Habits That Are Holding You Back
Author: Mary Karapetian Alvord,Anne McGrath
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
ISBN: 1626258910
Category: Young Adult Nonfiction
Page: 168
View: 1679

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You aren’t what you think! For teens with negative thinking habits, a licensed psychologist and a health journalist offer cognitive restructuring—a simple and effective cognitive behavioral approach to help you break free from the nine most common negative thinking habits that typically result in feeling sad, worried, angry, and stressed. This workbook offers a powerful technique called cognitive restructuring to help you reframe your thoughts, regulate your emotions, become a more flexible thinker, and stop letting your thoughts define who you are and how you feel. You’ll learn to target the nine specific kinds of negative thinking habits that can cause you to worry or feel bad, such as the I can’t habit, the doom and gloom habit, the all or nothing habit, the jumping to conclusions habit, and more! Each chapter will walk you through simple explanations of each kind of negative thought, and offers real-life examples—as well as the sorts of behaviors, emotions, and bodily sensations that might be expected. You'll also gain an understanding of unhelpful or unrealistic thoughts, how to challenge them, how to replace them with more realistic and helpful thoughts, and an action plan for moving forward. By recognizing these negative thinking habits, you’ll feel more in control and less anxious and sad. Most importantly, you’ll be able to see yourself and the world more clearly. Your thoughts don’t have to define who you are and how you experience life. The transdiagnostic approach in this book will show you how to kick negative thinking habits to the curb for good!

Get Over It!

Thought Therapy for Healing the Hard Stuff
Author: Iyanla Vanzant
Publisher: Hay House, Inc
ISBN: 1401947794
Category: Body, Mind & Spirit
Page: 360
View: 8378

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Get Over It! is a tool and a process that offers readers a path to dominion over their most powerful asset: their mind. In today’s turbulent climate, it can be challenging to stay on top of what is going on around us day-to-day, such as economic shifts, societal breakdowns, and lifestyle changes. We have become disconnected from our personal power, the intuitive light created by our autonomous thoughts. Through Get Over It!, a prayer book with a therapeutic underpinning, Iyanla offers practical tools based on the scientific theory of neuroplasticity, so we can transmute the dominant negative thought patterns (DNTPs) that threaten our sanity and spirituality on a daily basis. In Get Over It!, Iyanla identifies 42 common DNTPs and breaks them down into three key elements: 1. The train of thought that produces the pattern 2. A prayer and affirmation to neutralize the pattern 3. Self-directed spiritual practices (including meditations) that support the neutralization of the pattern in the mind and bod Through becoming aware of and neutralizing our DNTPs, we will up our “wattage”: our ability to see and live beyond the influences and turbulence of our external environment.

The Drama-free Way

A Thought-management Guide to Navigating Chaos and Thriving
Author: Jennifer Kern Collins
Publisher: Wise Ink Creative Publishing
ISBN: 9781634890106
Category:
Page: 304
View: 5440

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Drama, drama, dramaevery facet of our culture is steeped in it: politics, media, Hollywood, our corporate culture, even our health care is dripping with drama. And, like true junkies, we indulge in it endlessly. Drama addiction is real. But why do we have it? How did we even get here?